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Pressure

You might find that there's pressure on you to have sex

Going out with someone doesn't mean you have to do everything they might suggest, stay true to yourself. You might find that there's pressure on you to have sex.

"Are you scared? I'll be careful I won't hurt you"
"I can't have a relationship with someone who won't have sex with me"
"If you love me you would"
"What's the matter with you? Are you frigid or something?"
"Come on you're not a virgin, you're too spunky"

Be firm and stay in control. No one has the right to make you do something you don't want to. You have the right to say "Stop" or "Slowdown". Don't make excuses or apologise.

It's not always easy to say what you mean - you won't want to hurt the other person, put them off you, or leave them feeling really rejected.
If the situation gets difficult, try doing something that you both think is funny, so that you can laugh together and relax. Then you might find you can talk about how you feel, and what you want and don't want to do.

"You're going too fast for me"
"You're making me feel like you'll drop me if I don't"
"I like to make my own decisions"
"Don't push me I'll let you know when I'm ready"